im so tired and worried and ive learned how to just dull and dampen my emotions so i can smile and feel some vague sense of happiness at most points in the day.
im so exhausted when it comes to people because even though i know there is good there is so much bad that comes with it all and sometimes it feels like we’re drowning in it. like the world will never change and get better even though i know that’s not true because it has been changing and it has been getting better in some ways slowly but surely.
i just want my few loved ones to be safe and happy at this point i dont really care about if someone hurts me if it means they could be okay. i just want the few people i love to have true happiness.
Mfw Dustin touches my hair multiple times/keeps getting in my space and I freak out and talk to josh and basically ask him to ensure Dustin doesn’t ever do that again because I’m getting super uncomfortable.
I tell josh it isn’t often and w/e and josh goes it doesn’t matter how often/whatever his reasons are that’s unacceptable.